25 things you should have in your woman cave
Happy Black History Month! Try these "me time" supplies ranging from snacks to joggers to wine glass holders
Homegrown Tales subscribers,
I made my vote very clear on One Black Woman’s Vote, and the amount of stunts that have happened since the results were called are about as disturbing and stupid as I suspected. It is extremely important to me to support diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) products, black-owned products, woman-owned products, veteran-owned products and other marginalized groups that are being dismissed for simply existing.
Although I have no desire to step foot in a Target for the rest of my life, I do agree with Tabitha Brown that boycotting a store may also mean boycotting black-owned products and other small businesses from marginalized groups. So I will continue on with being an Amazon affiliate. There are a massive amount of products on Amazon that support groups I believe in and will continue promoting on my Substack channel.
In honor of Black History Month and to share my stance against the Trump administration’s antics, I’ve carefully incorporated new items below that support groups who I want to continue to thrive this year and beyond.
First published on September 14, 2024
It’s not that you don’t love your kids, your significant other or your dog. But sometimes you just need a moment to breathe and do the kind of things you did when it was just you. You need a room where you can have absolute “me time” without everybody bugging you. Men have man caves, but sometimes women need a woman cave too.
You’ve already seen what a joint office is like, and you don’t want the same problems that Bernie and Wanda had on “The Bernie Mac Show.” Pen clickers are the worst anyway.
You’d rather actually visit a gym or jog around the neighborhood with your dog than to clutter up a room with weights, a treadmill and a row machine. You’re looking for more personalized items, stuff your girlfriends can help you enjoy during a Girls Night and feel like you’re back in college again — not the dorms though, the off-campus apartment. Let’s figure out how to get you back to that place with these 25 suggestions.
Recommended Read: “10 things I wish I bought before my first day in the dorms ~ The everyday things college freshmen, including car owners, will need to make campus living easier”
As an Amazon Associate, and if you use my referral links, I earn a percentage from qualifying purchases of the recommended items below.
Breakfast Nook Chair
Even if you don’t have an official breakfast nook with the large window to stare aimlessly out of, you need a comfortable chair to sit in. Use it to read. Use it to nap. Use it to journal. Use it to daydream. Just make sure you can snuggle in it.
Books and Bookshelf
Although it’s labeled a kid’s bookshelf, this easy-to-assemble engineered wood shelf is just big enough to fit a few books and your preferred tchotchkes.
Hairstyling Accessories and Mirror
Are you in the mood to try something new with your hair? Play around, and test some styles. Don’t forget to bring a mirror so you can check yourself out when you’re done.
Plants (Real or artificial)
If you want to flex your green thumb in the prettiest way possible, these shelves do just that. You can use them indoors and outdoors.
And if you’ve long ago realized that you have a black thumb, there’s always a cool artificial plant and plant holder to enjoy. You don’t even have to worry about watering it or checking on the soil.
Air Freshener (Three-Wick Candles and Diffusers too)
When you walk into the room, it should smell inviting. Even the best cleaning spray goes away. Try three-wick candles or plug-in air fresheners. While there are plenty of brands, Bath & Body Works is by far one of the longest lasting and slow burning. Diffusers are also a therapeutic option to make the room smell amazing.
Couch and Table
And you don’t have to spend thousands of dollars on a comfortable couch and ottoman either. Shop around for what suits you best if your BFFs are stopping by. Vegan leather couches are a strong pick!
And coffee tables come in handy too. Just try not to get so much furniture in this woman cave to the point where you can’t move around freely. Your woman cave doesn’t need to look like a replica of your living room but have enough for it to at least compete with a den.
Blender and the Glassware
You can still go downstairs to your basement bar on occasion, but this is your time to try all those strange drinks you’ve been seeing in YouTube videos. If you want to take up Michael B. Jordan’s suggestion to make a mosstail, get a blender and try that too. Sip in peace.
Recommended Read: “Michael B. Jordan said sea moss drinks were his 'obsession,' so I tried it ~ For people with high blood pressure, Moss beverages may be a good option”
And if you want another kind of spirit, that’s all right too.
Mini Fridge and Portable Ice Maker
Of course you have to have a place to store some fruit and vegetables, along with ice for your smoothie or mocktail.
Recommended Read: Home & Texture: Taste-Testing the Best in Sugar-Free Mocktails
This mini fridge is also a perfect place for your hideaway from the family members who constantly eat your favorite foods. Buy extras. Tell no one. (The lowest price for this mini fridge is Prime Day from October 8-9.)
Wall Art
It doesn’t necessarily have to be this wall art (although I quite like it), but your wall decor should be something that is very personal to you. This is your dopamenu, your time to find something that makes you happy to look at as soon as you walk in the room. Maybe it’s your old architecture drawings from when you were in vocational school or that one canvas painting you started working on after ceramics painting wasn’t your bag. If you want to go as far as creating your own wallpaper accent wall, go for it.
Whatever it is, just be proud of it — and don’t choose a portrait, photo collage or painting that someone guilted you into putting up. It’s got to be something you would’ve grabbed the hammer and nails for on your own.
Wearable Blanket and Comfortable Lounge Wear
There are countless variations of the wearable blanket. Pick whichever one you like. Just know that oversized microfiber and sherba are like wearing a never-ending hug. You don’t have to worry about it slipping off or having to share the other half. Everywhere you go, it’s coming with you and won’t fall to the floor.
And if you’d rather wear your favorite hoodie, especially if you felt a way about this last presidential election, you can wear it in your woman cave. Some clothes are worth walking around outside for a bit for fresh air and so people can see it.
Charger
You don’t want to be fumbling around, trying to find outlets or realize your phone and your laptop are at 1%. Now you have to leave your woman cave to go find your regular charger.
Candy Machine (with not-so-healthy snacks)
If you’re looking to pile this candy dish up with sour patch kids, M&Ms and Starbursts, keep in mind that you should always seal this container when you leave. The last thing you want is silverfish lurking around — and those creepy insects love sweet treats (and books).
Healthy Snacks and Fruit Basket
If you want to be healthy and go for snacks like hazelnuts, almonds and honey roasted peanuts, go nuts (pun intended) in the candy dish above. Fresh fruit in a basket is always a winner. Or, try dried fruit, which will last longer than restocking fresh fruit trays.
Fruit Fly Trapper
You can’t eat candy and salty snacks the whole time you’re in your woman cave. Add some oranges, apples and maybe even an avocado for guacamole.
If you’re going to choose fruit that constantly attracts fruit flies though (read: bananas), get a fruit fly trap. (Or, use one of those wine glasses and pour red vinegar inside. Place a piece of plastic saran wrap or a sandwich bag over the glass. Punch a few holes and tighten the plastic around the glass. A rubber band is fine for this. Fruit flies are immediately attracted to red vinegar, and they’ll show up in no time.)
Nail Care and Spa Care Accessories
Whether it’s a pedicure, a manicure or just a nail soak, this is your time to have self-care and some pretty “me time.”
Pillow Set
You’re walking a fine line with having a couch and pillows in your woman cave. If you’re single and just want a quiet place away from your screaming kids, go for it. (Make sure the babysitter or older siblings watch them so they don’t tear up your house.) But if you have a significant other, try not to get into the habit of sleeping in your woman cave. The goal is to have a temporary place to hang out and have peace. You still want to make yourself available for quality time with him. But while you’re in your woman cave reading, napping and snacking, have a comfy blast!
Meditation Audio Devices
And while you’re taking that much-needed nap or meditating for mindfulness, you may need a little help focusing. These ocean boxes help guide you to the beach even if you don’t have time to go.
And the rest of what goes in your woman cave is up to you. If you want to bring your laptop, fine. If you want to bring in a large radio instead of smartphone speakers, go for it. Dance the day away. Or, if you just want to have a moment of peace where you can meditate with your favorite yoga mat and do absolutely nothing, that’s OK too.
Make sure to lock the door when you leave your woman cave though. The last thing you need is for your “me time” hangout to become a family room.
Did you enjoy this post? You’re also welcome to check out my Substack columns “Black Girl In a Doggone World,” “BlackTechLogy,” “Homegrown Tales,” “I Do See Color,” “One Black Woman’s Vote” and “Window Shopping” too. Subscribe to this newsletter for the monthly posts on the third Friday.
If you’re not ready to subscribe but want to support my writing, you’re welcome to tip me for this post! I’ll buy a dark hot chocolate on you. Thanks for reading!